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To End Domestic Violence – We Need to Focus on Educating Youth Now

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, and like our allied partners, we are emphasizing the importance of recognizing dating violence among teens in our communities and schools. National statistics indicate 1 in 3 teens will experience teen dating violence; forms of abuse are emotional/verbal, technological, sexual, financial, physical and spiritual or faith-based.

Through the teen Relationship Abuse Prevention Program (RAPP) we teach teens to identify signs of abuse, what a healthy relationship looks like and how to teach other teens to do the same. Do you remember what it was like to be a teen? Maybe you still are a teen. Regardless, there was no way I was telling my parents (guardians, teachers, etc.) anything personal when I was 15. The lack of trust in adults is the biggest barrier to helping teens prevent and/or escape from abuse. This is why we emphasize Peer-to-Peer education about teen dating violence.  We want teens empowering teens. We want them to know they are not alone and they can go to their peers when they are in crises.

RAPP paves the way to help teens achieve their goals, academically and personally. It gives them the tools and knowledge to help themselves and help others whom may be experiencing teen dating violence. It is my wish to see the Relationship Abuse Prevention Program in every single school, because education is key to prevention of further abuse.

Luis has directed CADV’s Department of Education & Community Services (ECS) since 1999. In that time, he has taken the lead to provide innovative nonresidential services to stop domestic violence and aid its survivors, raise community awareness about relationship abuse and let the community know about CADV’s services.

Our established Relationship Abuse Prevention Program (RAPP) is in place at fifteen intermediate and high schools citywide. Combined, RAPP teaches 27,000 students a year about healthy, communicative, non-violent relationships and directly counsels over 2,500 teens, individually and in groups. In addition, RAPP coordinators reach out to teachers, parents and community members, to teach warning signs that a teen may be violent or abused.

Asking the Right Questions

This month Vice President Joe Biden addressed leaders at the World Economic Forum to discuss violence and discrimination against women. He asked these leaders to focus on cultural change within our society to end violence against women. Mr. Biden’s message is extremely important, and I am often asked how someone can help victims of domestic violence. I tell people they can help victims and survivors of domestic violence, by simply listening. This is how we all can reinforce cultural change. We need to listen to one another – listen to our peers – and listen to those affected by abuse. Above all we need to listen without judgment.

Mr. Biden commented, "When a woman is raped, when a woman is abused, the first thing other women ask is what did you do? Why were you there? What were you wearing?" he said. “Folks, all the opportunity and entrepreneurship in the world is good. But ultimately, starting in this country, we have to change the culture. And we’re not going to change that culture until not a single woman who is abused ever asks herself: 'What did I do?'"

These are not the questions we should ask or reflect on. We need to question why these implications arise in our culture, and then we need to ask if the victim is okay. We should ask why the perpetrator would commit such a heinous crime. We need to stop victim blaming, which is a huge obstacle to victims feeling safe enough to report a crime.

2015 Year Highlights

Great news for survivors of domestic violence. The Center is proud to have been a part of the fight to increase the length of stay in domestic violence shelters in New York State.

2015 was the first full year survivors could stay in shelter for up to six months, to heal from the trauma of domestic violence.

This longer stay gives survivors time to build skills they need to live independent lives and never return to abusive relationships again. We worked with the New York City Coalition of Domestic Violence Residential Providers and the New York State Coalition Against Domestic Violence to bring about this change. I am honored to be a founding co-chair of the New York City Coalition and to represent the needs of the City on the State Coalition.

I wish everyone a happy and safe new year!

Best,

Judy Kahan

CEO

NASW Emerging and Mid-Career Social Work Leader Award Granted to CADV Director Luis Matos

Here at the Center we are fortunate to have Luis Matos, our Director of Education & Community Services. The National Association of Social Workers recognized Luis as a Mid-Career Exemplary Leader on December 3rd, at their 9th Annual Awards Dinner.  Luis shared this award night with other Top and Emerging Leader recipients.

Luis Matos (middle), sister – Lydia and friend – Frank.

Luis has directed CADV’s Department of Education & Community Services (ECS) since 1999. In that time, he has taken the lead to provide innovative nonresidential services to stop domestic violence and aid its survivors, raise community awareness about relationship abuse and let the community know about CADV’s services.

We applaud Luis for cultivating a society free from violence and abuse through education and intervention.  Since Luis has led the ECS utilization, our community-based case management services have tripled. ECS facilitates supports groups for Spanish speaking women, English speaking women and children affected by domestic violence.

Luis develops and coordinates CADV’s internal staff training and provides or trains others to provide training in the community. He is committed to developing the next generation of social workers, through supervision and mentoring.

Congratulations Luis for this well-deserved award!!

Domestic Violence Doesn't Take a Holiday

During the holiday season, reports of domestic violence incidents may vary by location, but one important fact remains the same – Domestic Violence doesn’t take a holiday. The Center Against Domestic Violence offers safety and joy to more than 60 families this holiday season. Courageous women have given up the comfort of their own homes to find safety for themselves and their children.

The holiday season is a difficult time to leave a batterer. Victims may stay in danger so their children can have a happy holiday with two parents. And, school vacation makes the logistics of leaving harder.

One of the most dangerous times for a domestic violence victim is while she is deciding to leave. Breaking free from abuse and control also means leaving her outside support system, which is never easy, but especially hard this time of year.

Click here to learn more about what it takes to leave a batterer, in an interview with The Maria Project's founder, Marcella Goheen.

Center Against Domestic Violence Hosts Domestic Violence Awareness Event

Shop Till it Stops Pop Up Event

In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, on October 24, 2015, the Center Against Domestic Violence hosted Shop Till it Stops – a pop up event – to recognize victims and survivors of domestic violence. Domestic Violence Awareness Month is a time to acknowledge the courage of people who have said “no” to violence and to spread awareness about domestic violence emergency shelters and services.

The Center contacted local community establishments to bring awareness of domestic violence to the Brooklyn community. Shop Till It Stops was held at The Living Gallery – an art gallery known for bringing diverse groups of people together and encouraging communication through the arts - in Bushwick, Brooklyn. Guests encountered a relaxed, fun shopping experience while learning about domestic violence through art and literature and chatting with CADV staff.  We were able to raise $3,000 in proceeds for this event. 

Whatever was not sold the day of the event was given to the women living in our shelters.

The event featured clothing sales from multiple participating vendors, including Eileen Fisher, Crossroads Trading Company, L.E.S amis, and donations from members of SoHo boxing gym Work Train Fight. Food was donated from Brooklyn Mac and Sahadi’s, beer was lovingly provided by Brooklyn Brewery, and art by Gwen Shockey and Sherry Tagoe. Owner of High Bridge Cold Brew, whose main mission is to employ victims of domestic violence, handed out free samples and donated $1 per every bottle sold at the event. Start-up owner of Mama D’s Tasty Treats sold her delicious Italian and zucchini bread and sweets, and also donated 25% of her proceeds to CADV. There were raffle prizes including Kerry Washington’s Purple Purse (of the Purple Purse Challenge), soap basket from Flynn & King, duvets from Remodo, gift card donated by TJ Maxx & an iced coffee basket from High Bridge Cold Coffee.

“Thank you to everyone who participated to make this happen. The support that was shown means so much to us and we can't wait to come together as a community again.”

– Judy Kahan, CEO 

Shop Till it Stops Photos

- Shop Till it Stops flyer created by artist Stephanie Haller